Do you get mad when things don’t go your way? Perhaps when your children do not want to wake up in the morning for school or when someone cuts you off in traffic? These are among other things that can make someone’s blood “boil”. Though anger is a normal feeling that occurs to everyone, the ability to keep your temper in check is essential in maintaining healthy relationships.
Lack of anger management can negatively affect your relationships since it can lead you to say mean things to your loved ones or children. Some people who cannot manage their anger issues may also lose jobs due to their anger sky-rocketing at their place of work.
That being the case, everyone should be aware of how to tame their anger. If you aren’t sure how to do so, you are at the right place since we provide some tips on how to do so.
Tips to Help Manage Anger
Always Think Before You Speak
When you are angry, it’s easy to say mean things that you might regret later on. To avoid this, try to think first before uttering a word. You may even hurt the other party even more and make things even worse. Besides, when you take time to think of what to say, you allow the other party to do the same.
Go for a Walk
Sometimes we tend to think that when you leave the scene of disagreement, you are a coward. However, this isn’t true. Instead of staying put and releasing your anger on someone, you are only making things worse. Leave and take a walk. Physical activity helps in reducing the stress that may escalate your anger.
Managing Anger – Take a Breathe
Most people undermine the power of a deep breath. When you are angry, your breathing becomes shallower and faster. To avoid this, ensure that you reduce the speed of your breathing by taking a deep breath. Inhale with your nose and exhale with the mouth. Repeat this several times, and you’ll feel a lot better.
Counting down is yet another strategy for controlling your anger. Count from 1-10 or the other way round. If you are really pissed off, count from 100. By the time you reach 50, you’ll start to notice that your anger is slowly subsiding.
Repeat a Mantra
Look for a word that makes you feel calm. Repeat it as many times as you can until you feel better. Words such as “Relax,” “Take it easy,” and “Everything will be alright” are some of the words that can make you feel calm.
When you feel as if your anger is escalating, try to remain quiet. Assume that your lips are fluid together that even if you really want to say something, you can’t. A moment of quietness will give you some time to think over the matter.
Play Some Music
Music has the magic to carry us away. With good music playing in your ears, you are bound to forget about everything and even might dance to the tune. Let the music heal your anger whenever you are angry.
Managing Anger – Have a Lone Time
Take a break. Isolate yourself from others to reflect on the issue and to keep your emotion neutral. A quiet time helps you meditate and reflect on things that matter to you. When you are done, you’ll be feeling calmer and reenergized that you’ll want to make it a routine.
Stick With “I”
To avoid blaming others who might be adding some salt on a fresh wound, use “I” statements to elaborate the matter. Respect the other party and be mindful of what you are saying. For instance, you can say, “I am mad because you didn’t call me,” instead of saying, “You didn’t even bother to call.”
Don’t Hold Grudges
Practice forgiveness. It sets you free from anger. Don’t see forgiveness as a cowardly thing, better yet as strength. Forgiveness serves as a lesson and might strengthen your relationships.
Write It Down
Unsaid words can be written. Write down what makes you angry, your feelings, and how you want to respond to the matter. The time you take to write down everything will act as your cooling moment and have a clear understanding of matters that piss you off.
Find Immediate Solution
If you are angry that your child’s room is a mess, shut the door. Perhaps your spouse is always late for supper; schedule dinners for later hours. These temporary solutions can prevent you from getting angry and focus on other important things.
Managing Anger – Avoid Sarcasm
Sarcastic words won’t solve anything; they only worsen the matter. Listen to the other party and be respectful. Sometimes you might use sarcastic words to inflict pain on the other person, but it can turn out worse than you thought.
Talk About It
Talk to someone you trust about your feelings. It might be a friend, relative, or workmate. Just don’t let your anger consume you from inside. You may find that lots of people are experiencing what you are going through. Someone might offer a solution that will leave you in a better mood.
Put yourself on the other person’s shoe. How would you react to a similar situation? How would you like to be treated in a similar situation? These questions might help you in dealing with the issue in a better way.
Managing Anger – Seek Help
If you get angry more often and you cannot control yourself, you should see a doctor. There might be underlying health issues that might need a professional’s help. It’s normal to get angry even about small issues, but the inability to manage your anger might not be normal.
We are all the same in the sense that we all get angry. However, the ability and inability to control our emotions make everyone unique. Avoid staying angry for too long since it can cost you your relationships. Besides, staying angry for too long is not good for your general health.